Coincidences... Or no?

The way some things happen really baffle me sometimes... Like, is everything just a coincidence or do certain things happen for a reason?

Before I begin, I need to explain a few things. Firstly, I will speak in code. As most of my 7 (yay!) followers on this blog are male, I find that pretty fucking hilarious seeing as I apparently think like a male does but alas, will be blogging in code for certain things, like most women speak and live their whole lives in code. (I never understood that - why do you do that, chicks?) Anyways, male followers, you need not worry because I am always very honest and to the point. "Pussy footing" as we say in South Africa, or "beating around the bush" for the rest of the world, is not my thing. When I say I will be speaking in code, I mean that if I need to mention certain people they will have very distinctive code names so that my readers will be able to differentiate between who I am blogging about. I think that it's only fair to keep these people's names a secret, not because I'm a coward, but because it wouldn't be fair on them if I vomited their names all over the internet for strangers to read about. And if they happened to read this blog they would know I was talking about them because 1) they're not fucking retarded and 2) I have actually sometimes addressed them by their code names. And I really couldn't give two shits if they read these posts and are offended. These code names that I will be using were started from a very long time ago while skinnering and gossiping with Best Friend. See what I just did? ;)

Okay. Three men will feature in this post today. Heart Dragger, Rebound Boyfriend and Running Boy. A brief history to get you up to date on things. Heart Dragger and I have been *friends (read *Not anymore) for about 6-7 years now. And for 6 months this year he tore me apart and played with me as much as he wanted and dragged me along and hurt me, hence the name Heart Dragger. During the Heart Dragger episode, in about March of this year, Running Boy came into the picture and then left after a few months. I really can't figure out for myself if he played with me or not, maybe you can decide and let me know when you've read this. And then Rebound Boyfriend is exactly that. The boy I decided would be my rebound for when Heart Dragger and I FINALLY sort of ended.

Heart Dragger and I, from about December/January, were going well. We had rekindled our childhood friendship and become so incredibly close in a very short period of time. We used to speak everyday, and every week, be it once or 3 times, we would see each other. We'd sit outside and talk and laugh and drink coffee. Soon after we did that as well as kissing, holding hands.. You know, lover stuff. We were "together" until the 19th March (how pathetic am I for remembering the date?), lying in bed at three in the morning after just having sex/making love (our views differed), he broke my heart. That's where all the shit started. That fucking incredible and lovely and pitiful night of March the 19th. From there we were up and down. I was in love with him, one day he liked me then he didn't then he did then he didn't again...

And then Running Boy arrived. Never once was it ever said aloud that we were flirting with each other, or that we were considering each other as potential lovers, partners, a couple, whatever. Oh but I knew. The way he spoke to me, the way he so enjoyed talking to me all day every day.. He started making it better. He knew about Heart Dragger. He knew and he wanted to make it better. He wanted to be the better man, the man who deserved me. In April, when Heart Dragger was trying to decide what he wanted (he still can't to this day, by the way), there I was waiting for Running Boy to ask me out, sweep me off my feet... I was expecting that specific weekend because he had been busy and that was his first weekend he had free. To see me. That's what he had promised, or maybe that's what I assumed. Or expected.

As tradition, Heart Dragger and I took my dog for a walk. By the end of our walk, he broke the news to me. He wasn't ready to be in a relationship at present so that meant I would be alone and without him and I could either get over him (didn't happen. Still not happening) or I could wait for him (happened. Still happening). Of course, I already knew this. Note: If a boy is not sure if he wants you or not, HE DOESN'T WANT YOU. Whether that is a lie to you or themselves or whatever, they say that but they mean the truth that you dread. So I was sad. Again, as usual. The ever typical girl in love, supportive friend and martyr, I told him I understood and would still be his friend because that was more important to me than the person I want to spend the rest of my life with saying he didn't want me.

I went home. Sighed and cried and decided to lose myself in the lame and boring lives of my Facebook friends. Alas, what did I see there? "Running Boy is now in a relationship." Obviously someone's life had not been lame and boring. That was why he hadn't been replying to my messages for the past couple days before that. There was my back up, not being my back up anymore and it sucked old man balls. I liked him, he was very slowly stealing me away and making it better.. He used to get so angry about how stupid Heart Dragger was for not wanting me, for hurting me... I'm ashamed that I still remember it, but he sent me a text message once saying "So, gorgeous, how am I going to fix your heart?" He wanted to fix me. I thought he wanted to fix me... And then he went and found a gorgeous, sophisticated, sultry looking sex bomb blonde. Insult.
That wasn't nice, being rejected by two guys on the same day? Now, don't get me wrong, Heart Dragger never has known what he's wanted. I know I am coming across as a girl who would have settled for either one... I wouldn't. If I could choose, sadly, it would be Heart Dragger. As much as he has destroyed me and ruined everything, I would run right back to him if he would give me the chance. That's what silly little girls in love do. The only reason why I wanted Running Boy, was because I know that Heart Dragger is bad for me. I know that he doesn't deserve me, nor will he treat me half as properly as anyone would expect. I wanted Running Boy because he would have made it better. Because why wouldn't a broken hearted girl want to be with a guy who wanted her, even if he wasn't her perfect guy? Better Running Boy than nothing at all. He's a fucking great catch, and his girlfriend is beyond blessed and lucky to have him.

Until early August, I got tired of Heart Dragger's bullshit and ended everything, the friendship, everything. And out of nowhere, Rebound Boyfriend came along and also started to make it better. I was happy for two months until he broke up with me no more than a week ago. It couldn't be helped, but that's a story for another day.

That day I received a text message from Heart Dragger. He misses me. Is that weird? Or just a coincidence? Unfortunately for him my reply was pretty funny and scary... I think I scared him away with my demented thinking HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.

And then, the other night happened. Running Boy is having girlfriend problems and he decides to vent at ME about it. Me. That's funny, seeing as I'm such a failure when it comes to dating.

But never the less, I find this ironic. Is it just coincidental that I will not hear from these people for weeks at a time but then they arrive at a time that I have been pathetically dumped by my rebound in a text message?
This shit is fucking weird to me okay.